IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Because many children are not able to learn foreign language, schools should not force to learn foreign language. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

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In the contemporary world,
children
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 are required to learn more than one
language
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 in schools.
However
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, people's opinions are polarised on
this
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 topic, whether it is good to learn an extra
language
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 or spending a huge amount of time for foreign
language
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 can distract students from the main subjects. I support that learning foreign languages is beneficial for the student and will try to provide relevant reasons in the following paragraphs. To commence, acquiring a new
language
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, demands true hard work and patience from students who are at the early stage of their lives. Spontaneously, after having a huge amount of pressure
children
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 starts to lose interest in another main subject. Put simply, 7 years old girl or boy who is studying a foreign
language
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 daily, will never be focused on mathematics or literature at home after a long day of school.
Moreover
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, the child who has not learned the native
language
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 yet, cannot efficiently acquire the new one. On the flip side of the coin, learning an additional
language
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 at school can be challenging for young students, but it will be paid off in the future.
Firstly
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, extra
language
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 is the key tool for finding useful information in the modern world, because the vast majority of the sources in the library is in different languages.
Secondly
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, if a student is smart enough to learn a
second
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language
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 and has sufficient knowledge, he or she will not face the obstacles to finding the proper job in a competitive society. On a concluding, modern school that requires
children
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 to learn an additional
language
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 have both benefits and drawback.
However
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, I am sure that
children
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 with the knowledge of extra
language
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 can easily find their place in modern society.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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