In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #children #think #government #responsibility

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Undoubtedly,the

food

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culture is changed drastically over the years.The average weight of the heir in most of the countries is quite high.Some people argue that authorities are responsible for the obesity among children whereas their counterparts disagree with the argument.Both sides of the argument are discussed in the forthcoming paragraphs and I side with the latter argument.

Firstly

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,the major cause of overweight among children is the fast evolvement of the fast-

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industry.

For example

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,a survey shows that the major consumer of Coke is heir below ten years.Authorities should consider

this

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factor and put more regulations on the fast-

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industries.

On the contrary

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,adolescents tend to imitate the eating habit of their parents.Due to the busy life schedule,adults consume snack bars and junk

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on a regular basis.

Additionally

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,the cooking culture is vanishing due to the fast evolvement of

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delivery applications.These companies provide exciting offers and

hence

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people are biased a lot to them.

For instance

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,local

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delivery app Yemmitto provide a variety of offers to the customers to compete with giants like zomato.

Furthermore

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, the unhealthy lifestyle of parents are copied by the offspring and

this

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habit is the root cause of obesity.

Moreover

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,adults should follow a strict healthy meal plan and they should constantly monitor the

food

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habit of their younger generation. To conclude,even though the huge influence of the junk industry is vital in obesity among children,the main culprit is the parents.A healthy diet plan should be followed by each individual to maintain a healthy body.

Therefore

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,adults should maintain a healthy body and should set themselves as role models for the

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generation.

Submitted by amitha13489 on Wed Feb 02 2022

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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