IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that traveling along is better than travelling with a group of people. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #group
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Nowadays,many individuals tend to commute when they are free from work like weekends as well as getting bored,but many
people
Use synonyms
 believe that commuting with friends is far better than going solitary.In my view,travelling with other
people
Use synonyms
 ensures ample benefits.
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both statements. To
emabark
Correct your spelling
embark
 on,going with a team of
people
Use synonyms
 facilitates entertainment and reduce the boredom like we can talk the whole journey.
secondly
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,there is a chance to play games
such
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 as cards and ludo in order
to
Correct your spelling
so
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 we can pass the time easily.
moreover
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,sometimes it gives us strength and confidence,so we do not have to
afraid
Add a missing verb
be afraid
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 by seeing
a
Change the article
an
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 unknown
persons
Correct the article-noun agreement
person
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.
additionally
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,we can watch a movie together through the mobile phone.
for instance
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,during my summer vacation,I went to one famous temple by
a
Remove the article
apply
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train with my friends.I did a lot of
enjoy
Replace the word
enjoyment
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 with her company by seeing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature through window .it was my best memory in my life,
therefore
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 travelling with someone enables safety and caring. On another side,as far as
Iam
Correct your spelling
I am
I'm
 concerned, staying at home is better than travelling alone
,
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apply
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because it is dangerous
,
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apply
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if we commute alone and something happened to us
like
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as
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 a small accident
then
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 nobody going to assist us,
therefore
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 it leads to
big
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a big
the big
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 issue.
in addition
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 to,there are no enjoyment and
unsaftey
Correct your spelling
safety
unsafety
.
for example
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,recently my friend
have
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has
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 gone to
supermarket
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the supermarket
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 by
a
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apply
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bus for groceries.unfortunately,she got a heart attack in her middle way nobody was with her after some time volunteers came and took her to hospital,but
finally
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 she died.actually,I mean to say that travelling with a group of
people
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 is very imperative. To conclude,many individuals have
diverse
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a diverse
the diverse
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mindset
Fix the agreement mistake
mindsets
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 which
vary
Change the verb form
varies
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 from person to person,
therefore
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 they decide whether commuting a team of
people
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 is
safety
Replace the word
safe
show examples
 or going alone is
safety
Replace the word
safe
show examples
.going with other
people
Use synonyms
 facilitates more benefits than commuting alone.
Submitted by anushachenna15 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • collaborative environment
  • discussion
  • debate
  • exchange of ideas
  • critical soft skills
  • communication
  • teamwork
  • leadership
  • emotional and motivational support
  • isolating
  • personalized pace
  • efficient learning
  • self-discipline
  • accountability
  • educational progress
  • distractions
  • group dynamics
  • commitment
What to do next:
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