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Band 6.5

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. some people regard this as completely wrong , while others consider it a valuable work experience, which is important for learning & taking Responsibility. what is your opinion ?

#countries #children #work #people #responsibility
Nowadays , in many regions,
children
 are involved in different types of
jobs
 for assisting themselves financially. A group of thoughts believe that it is harmful whereas others think it is beneficial for their development. I support the former one and will explicate reasons to claim the same in the upcoming paragraphs. Commencing with, it will distract Students from their studies.
In other words
, at an early stage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Add a comma
,life
show examples
 they will get some money by doing
work
 which create greed for money in their mind which put them in the wrong direction .
Children
 start to miss their classes for doing extra
work
 so that they can earn more money. Apart from
this
, it misleads the students from their actual potential.
For instance
 , most
children
 get
jobs
such
 as mopping the floor, washing clothes and serving food in restaurants, which can not help in providing necessary skills for their future growth. They stick to
jobs
 that required manual
work
 and less pay. Whereas , critics believe that it is important to apply their learning to the actual
work
 environment for gaining experience . Just by getting theoretical ,knowledge one cannot become an expert in any field. The tasks assigned to
children
 do not support
this
 argument as
children
 do get tasks according to their skill sets rather they get
jobs
 of low scale.
Furthermore
, some say that it helps the student to manage their finances on their own which makes them responsible person
however
 las per my point of view getting salary at an early stage of life make
children
 lavish. To conclude, appropriate measures should be taken to restrict
children
 from
work
 . it can create hurdles in their career growth
Submitted by ritu1508.dcsa on

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Child labor
  • Exploitation
  • Minimum age
  • Work experience
  • Survival
  • Taking responsibility
  • Education
  • Poverty
  • Legal restrictions
  • Physical toll
  • Psychological impact
  • Cultural perceptions
  • International conventions
  • Economic impact
  • Work-study programs
  • Skilled labor
  • Unskilled labor
  • Developing economies
  • Moral implications
  • Professional development
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