Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Many opine that music is a suitable method of assembling the population of various cultures together. From my point of view ,I completely agree with
this
idea. I
also
believe that it should be increased among human beings.
Firstly
,one of the main reasons for
this
argument is the power of songs.
For instance
,most of the population all around the world habitually prefer to
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
a good interaction with another culture by listening to its songs. We all know songs say everything
that is
related to peoples' traditional culture.
This
could cause a recognition
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
different things that are trends in all areas around the globe so making communications can be easier .
This
is a noticeable reason for approaching human beings together.
Therefore
,
this
makes it clear why there is a common belief among the communities about creating
close_knit
Correct your spelling
close-knit
relationships via
this
method.
Secondly
,another conspicuous reason is understanding the emotions when we are listening to a foreign song.
For instance
,psychologists regularly believe when human beings transport a song to their friends and partners they definitely want to reveal their emotions that
this
piece of music is describing better than single words. There is no denying that to understand people's feelings
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
diverse types of things quickly we can assemble together
for generating
Change preposition
to generate
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
worldwide communication.
As a result
,it becomes apparent music has the power to transform tough things into effortless items that we can not ignore. To summarise ,I strongly agree with
this
idea.
Additionally
,I have
this
belief that it should
be rose
Wrong verb form
rise
show examples
quickly. It is predicted that to continue
this
activity among countries people from different cultures will be brought together.
Submitted by maede.sadeghi8520 on

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grammar
Be sure to use the right prepositions. For example, 'increased among human beings' should be 'increased for human beings'.
style
Avoid using overly formal or complex language when it's not necessary. This can make your writing harder to understand.
structure
Work on clarity of idea presentation. Some thoughts seem a bit convoluted and hard to understand.
grammar
Ensure your tenses are consistent. Instead of 'it should be rose quickly', you should say 'it should rise quickly'.
content
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural diversity
  • harmony
  • integration
  • bridging gaps
  • foster
  • ignite
  • embrace
  • communicate
  • celebrate
  • appreciate
  • inclusivity
  • universal language
  • emotional resonance
  • shared experiences
  • intercultural dialogue
  • intergenerational connections
  • cultural exchange
  • catalyst
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