Some academics say that every child should be taught to play an instrument. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

#academics #child #instrument

It is often said that teaching an instrument should be increased in educational centres and all children should learn it. From my point of view ,I strongly agree with

this

idea. I

also

believe that

this

decision should be

performed

Verb problem

made

show examples

as soon as possible.

Firstly

, one of the main reasons for

this

argument is the power of playing instruments in human brains.

For example

,playing a kind of musical instrument could reinforce some activities that need to exert the energy of our brains

such

as learning difficult subjects (science or maths).

This

could create a suitable space to learn these courses constructively and the brain commences working hard.

This

is a conspicuous and persuasive reason to accept

this

positive operation.

Therefore

this

makes it clear why playing

these

Change preposition

with these

show examples

gadgets should be encouraged and increased in school.

Secondly

,another reason is ,

playing

Correct word choice

that playing

show examples

instruments is a type of art. There is no denying that art can be useful in

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

lifestyles and change something.

For instance

,playing the guitar and the piano could change

human's

Change noun form

human

show examples

beliefs because art can transform traditional thoughts into modern beliefs.

This

could help a child to merge into living in

today

Change noun form

today's

show examples

modern world.

Additionally

this

operation would open doors to think and solve problems effortlessly because of becoming down_to_earth.

As a result

,it becomes apparent there are multiple reasons behind each claim via societies that we can not ignore. All things considered ,I completely agree with

this

idea that academics habitually reflect on. It is predicted that to increase playing instruments children will become smarter and human brains will be more powerful.

Submitted by maede.sadeghi8520 on Fri Feb 18 2022

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task response

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. Develop your ideas further to enhance clarity and comprehensiveness. Ensure that your introduction and conclusion fully address the topic and summarize your main points effectively.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the logical flow of your essay by using transitional phrases to connect ideas more effectively. Ensure that each paragraph is well-organized and focuses on a single main point.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some academics say that every child should be taught to play an instrument. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

Some people think that it is better to more to other countries for greater work and life apportunities. Other argue that it is best to stay in their home country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There are both problems and benefits for high school students to study plays and other works for theater that were written centuries ago. Use your own experience to discuss it.

Task 2 Men and women can never share the same responsibilities at home and in everyday life. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.