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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#universities #numbers #students
Since our
greatgrand's
Correct your spelling
great-grand's
great-grandma's
great grand's
 generation
universities
 didn't accept equal
numbers
 of male and female
students
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 in those so-called mandly major subjects
such
 as
sceince
Correct your spelling
science
, maths and physics where males are given priority the same goes with the so-called girly arts majors
such
 as painting and designer . The disgusting heritage is still going on till today. If equality is not shown in
universities
then
 where ?
Thus
universities
 should set
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an example and accept equal
numbers
 of male and female
students
 in every subject despite the genders. I strongly agreed
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
step
 and in my
opnion
Correct your spelling
opinion
universities
 could improve in
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 things by taking
this
step
Add the comma(s)
, for example,
show examples
for example
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 conflicts
base
Wrong verb form
based
show examples
 on genders.
People
 used to look down on female presidents thinking that they are not capable to look after a country and the same goes
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
male
Add an article
the male
a male
show examples
chef
Fix the agreement mistake
chefs
show examples
. If you look carefully
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 those
people
 who think that way, you will see one common thing in them,
that is
lack
Add an article
a lack
the lack
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 education which
also
 means school or university couldn't educate them well. Some
people
 might say that accepting equal
numbers
 of male and female
students
 in every subject is
such
 a small
step
 or will it even change anything. I say " one
step
 is better than non".
Universities
 are the place where
people
 learn to the fullest not just from books but
also
 about life and the only place they will meet with
people
all
Change preposition
of all
show examples
shape
Fix the agreement mistake
shapes
show examples
,
size
Fix the agreement mistake
sizes
show examples
,
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
 and
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
.
By favouring
Change preposition
Favouring
show examples
 one for its gender is the same as teaching " favouring"
instead
 of " Equality". Taking a
step
 in showing humanity is beautiful whether
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 small or big. Treating everyone the same no matter what their gender is
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 deed.
Hence
,
universities
 should accept equal
numbers
 of male and female
students
 in every subject.
Submitted by Zinnat Baygam on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
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