Some people hold the opinion that children should obey certain rules made by teachers and parents. Others, however, feel that these rules only limit children’s growth and impact their adult life later. Discuss both opinions and provide your own view.

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While some people believe that strict
upbringing
is
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
approach
Add the particle
to approach
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to
raise
Wrong verb form
raising
show examples
a child, others feel that firm rules can influence
children
negatively. I believe that only a fair amount of rules are needed to keep
kids
within the frame. In
this
essay I will discuss some examples
were
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where
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kids
should be limited along with areas
were
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where
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they should be given
a
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apply
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freedom
. On one hand,
kids
cannot differentiate between goods and bads. In
this
regard,
parent
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parents
show examples
and teachers are good role models for babies.
Kids
should be aware of the limits. As an example, watching too much TV can result
to
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in
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child obesity and
also
can impair
children
's
unmature
Correct your spelling
unmatured
immature
vision. In cases like
this
,
children
's authority should be limited. In
this
regard, strict rules must be set and abide by parents like watching TV only for one hour a day.
Moreover
,
children
must understand
econimical
Correct your spelling
economical
state of the family.
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They
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The
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They
show examples
must know that they could not own any toy
that is
advertiset
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advertised
on TV. Setting financial
limitation
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limitations
show examples
for growing babies would develop a skill to manage
financial
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finances
show examples
... in the future.
On the other hand
, a strict
upbringing
can kill
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
creativity.
Kids
should have the
freedom
to make choices
were
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where
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it is not harmful
for
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to
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them.
For instance
, they can be given
a
Correct article usage
the
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freedom
to choose what to wear and they can
also
pick friends with family's supervision. It is expected that they make some wrong choices
,
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apply
show examples
like
Replace the word
as
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adults do. As we learn a lot from our mistakes
children
also
learn essential skills while making mistakes. To conclude, I believe that
children
are very smart. They observe adults and
immitate
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imitate
their behaviour. Teachers and
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
can play an active role
for
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in
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upbringing
a child by setting
appropriate
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an appropriate
the appropriate
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level of control for them as desired. While they need
limitaions
Correct your spelling
limitations
in some areas,
freedom
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
other areas are essential for their stable
upbringing
.
Submitted by bahar.nazarzadeh88 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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