IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people say that we must send our parents to old age home when they reach 60. However other think that they must be taken care at home. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #parents #age #home #care
As medical technology quickly advances, humans are able to enjoy a longer lifespan. In general, taking
care
 of our old
parents
 should be our priority, but some say that sending our
parents
 to an old
age
home
 is better for them.
This
 essay will discuss both views, and I personally think that old
parents
 should be taken
care
 of at
home
. The argument that we should take
care
 of our own
parents
 is being put forth by some is because as we grow, we should be able to serve them back. With our
parents
 at
home
, we will be able to monitor and address their needs, which in return will make them happy and feel cared for.
Additionally
, in their golden years, they would want to be able to play with their grandchildren to fill their time.
Therefore
, taking
care
 of our
parents
 at
home
 has several advantages over the old
age
home
.
On the other hand
, the supporters of old
age
 homes say that it is better to send their
parents
 because
this
 will allow their
parents
 to receive professional
care
 from qualified nurses.
Furthermore
, there are a lot of activities provided for the
parents
 to stay active and to socialise.
Although
 there is a limitation on visitors, grandchildren will still be able to visit them during the weekends.
Thus
, sending our
parents
 to a caretakers
home
 confers the best of both worlds. To summarise,
although
 it seems that sending our old
parents
 to old
age
home
 has more benefits, I personally feel that old
parents
 should be with their families. The sacrifice and contribution of our
parents
 are beyond what we can repay, and if we are capable, both in terms of time and finances, we should take
care
 of our own
parents
 when they reach 60 years and older.
Submitted by izzatmbasri on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: