What could be done to encourage people to buy local products? An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online?
Recently, shopping online or e-commerce seems to be expanding in society because a vast number of people are using it to purchase what they need. The advantages and disadvantages of shopping online in both
customer’s
view and Correct article usage
the customer’s
company’s
view will be discussed Correct article usage
the company’s
as
below.
Primarily from the customer perspective, the significant advantage is that shopping online is very convenient which saves a lot of time, money, and effort. Change preposition
apply
For example
, customers can just be in the comfort of their home or workplace and order the products
they want. They don’t need to make a trip to the shopping malls for every single purchase. However
, there are a few disadvantages to e-commerce, such
as potential fraud. The security of payment is still a questionable issue in internet
shopping, and once overlooked, identity and bank information can leak out through fake transactions. Capitalize word
Internet
Furthermore
, to test
or Change the verb form
testing
to see
the Change the verb form
seeing
products
in close proximity is not possible over the internet
, which can Capitalize word
Internet
increase
the possibility of product returns.
Secondly
from the company’s view, the positive outcome of e-commerce is saving cost. The company does not need the retail stores to show Add a comma
Secondly,
up
their Change preposition
apply
products
; as a result
, the payment of rental areas for shopping stores will decrease. Furthermore
, the massive number of products
can be kept in a huge storage area that can easily manage
and spread to consumers. Wrong verb form
be managed
By contrast
, there is still a disadvantage of
online Change preposition
to
purchase
. The competition among various chains tends to happen greatlyFix the agreement mistake
purchases
,
and causes smaller companies, which have low Remove the comma
apply
potentials
to Fix the agreement mistake
potential
increase
their sales, cannot
operate their business and Verb problem
to
finally
close the companies.
In conclusion, the increase
of
purchasing online affects both customers and companies. And, it is inevitable that local Change preposition
in
products
are still essential to the local economy that can generate some revenue to
local people. A suggestion to encourage people to buy more local Change preposition
for
products
could be a government campaign which may either reduce tax for locally made products
or increase
tax for international ones.Submitted by hsmkashi on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
While your introduction is clear, try to refine it to directly relate it to the topic by mentioning some specific scenarios that elaborate on the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping. This can help provide a stronger start and a more focused response.
task achievement
Including more detailed and specific examples can strengthen your arguments even further. For instance, you might provide data or anecdotes about online shopping trends and their impacts.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the conclusion ties back to your key points more coherently. Connecting the suggestion about government campaigns more directly to the rest of the essay would improve overall cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next. Using linking words or phrases can enhance the flow of ideas. For example, using words like 'Firstly', 'Moreover', or 'On the other hand' can help guide your reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with clear paragraphs that discuss different perspectives -- customers and companies.
task achievement
You've effectively balanced the advantages and disadvantages for both consumers and companies.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and focused, addressing the task appropriately.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example