In spite of the advanves made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Undeniably, in today's modern world with lots of changes and improvements in agriculture
still
Add a comma
,still
show examples
there are so many
people
suffering from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hunger
.
To begin
with, population growth caused
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
use more
food
resources
whitout
Correct your spelling
without
any limitations even with the significant farming improvements. So we are destroying
food
products and
food
sources by consuming more than our needs in our daily life and we never consider
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
others
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
our planet while we can change our lifestyle to help others against
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hunger
.
Although
, in some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of the world,
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
in undeveloped countries
such
as Africa they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
have the ability
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
knowledge
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
true farming methods.
As a result
of
this
, they can never use their soil and resources to feed their
people
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. Whereas other countries can
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
theire
Correct your spelling
their
there
studies and fields about farming at
univercities
Correct your spelling
universities
to encourage their
people
to study about farming in different environments and
finally
send them to those undeveloped countries with lots of benefits to tackle the
hunger
problem.
However
, encouraging
people
to use equal to their needs and gift their money or extra
food
to some charities to help poor
people
can be a good idea. In conclusion,
people
with over
food
consumtion
Correct your spelling
consumption
can destroy all the resources
whitout
Correct your spelling
without
concerning about others in poorer situations to save them
dieing
Change preposition
from dieing
show examples
by
Change preposition
from
show examples
hunger
problems. So we need to change our way of living and plan to help them.
Submitted by sara.salimi77a on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: