Some people think high school graduates should travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches.

Currently, there is much
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
discussion with regard to
gap
Correct article usage
the gap
show examples
year
of
students
. It is argued that some
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
believe that before the teenager will study at the university need to have
gap
Correct article usage
a gap
show examples
year
for
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
experience.
In contrast
, some people believe that should learn the university before
work
or travel. Actually,there are a
lot
of advantages about the juvenile
find
Wrong verb form
finding
show examples
the
passion
or
try
Wrong verb form
trying
show examples
to do something that correctly choices but there is
disadvantage
Add an article
a disadvantage
show examples
which can not be overlooked
such
as when
students
work
and have to decide
sometime
Correct your spelling
sometimes
show examples
maybe incorrect way because of without
knowleage
Correct your spelling
knowledge
.
To begin
with the advantages of
this
topic
such
as experiences out of
school
Add an article
the school
a school
show examples
of teenagers.
Accaully
Correct your spelling
Actually
, there are a
lot
of
students
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
show examples
not understand
theirselve
Correct your spelling
themselves
and do not have a dream in their life or some people do not have a
passion
for
next
step
in
Add the comma(s)
, in this case,
show examples
this
case have a
lot
of problem in Thailand.
The most
Correct article usage
Most
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
teenagers select the
facaulty
Correct your spelling
faculty
because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
major is accepted from social so
students
just learn for
granduate
Correct your spelling
graduate
but do not have
passion
Add an article
a passion
the passion
show examples
or really dream
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
this
.
Thus
the
gap
year
will help
them
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
who want
ot
Correct your spelling
to
find
passion
.
On the other hand
,there are a
lot
of disadvantages.For
instease
Correct your spelling
instance
instead
, a
lot
of
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
work
when
gap
year
and
work
they have to decide the problem.
However
, they do not have a
lot
of
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
show examples
which is not enough for
revise
Wrong verb form
revising
show examples
turible
Correct your spelling
terrible
situations.
Futuremore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, some
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
have to come back to study with
junior
Fix the agreement mistake
juniors
show examples
. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
a
lot
of
student
Change to a plural noun
students
show examples
would
Correct pronoun usage
who would
show examples
like to find
passion
so they have to try
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
and learn education out of school.In
constrast
Correct your spelling
contrast
,there are a
lot
of people
decide
Correct pronoun usage
who decide
show examples
worse because they are too young for
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
.
Submitted by suchaya211 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: