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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of younge adults, compared with the number of older people.

#time #population #countries #younge #adults #people
Undeniabely
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Undeniably
, in
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today's
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
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 world, the most significant
propotion
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proportion
 of some
countries
 consist of
younge
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young
 adults compared whit the number of older. Each of these groups
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 both advantages and disadvantages. In fact, in my point of view, younger
generations
 have more positive aspects for their
countries
 rather than older
generations
.
To begin
 with,
youth
Correct article usage
the youth
show examples
 generation
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 so much power and energy which it relates to their age and body potential
,
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apply
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 can be more constructor than older
generations
.
In other words
, younger
people
 have more creativity and knowledge to solve the problems and help to improve the country and
also
 they can adapt
theirself
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themselves
show examples
 with
new
Add an article
the new
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 modern world with different technologies. While the education process for young
people
 can cost too much for governments but it
worth
Add a missing verb
is worth
show examples
 it. Whereas some
countries
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
un
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in
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 Europe
such
 as Italia or Spain, make some study or work conditions to attract young
people
.
On the other hand
, it is true that older
generations
didnt
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didn't
 have that
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
 abilities to work compared to a young person but they were
exprienced
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experienced
 in
lot's
Change noun form
lots
show examples
 of fields to teach others. Especially in some mechanical subjects, younger
generations
 should use their knowledge and
exprience
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experience
expense
.
However
, they cost governments dearly. Costs including insurance and pension
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
neccessary
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necessary
 for older
people
 that governments need to consider. In conclusion, with all the costs and problems which
causes
Wrong verb form
caused
show examples
 by younger
people
 for a
country
Add a comma
,country
show examples
 it is really
neccessary
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necessary
 to raise youth to help for improvements and
counstructions
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construction
constructions
 of a country so in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 it is a good point for
countries
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 most of their population is young and useful.
Submitted by sara.salimi77a on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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