IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people think everyone should be a vegetarian, because we do not need to eat meat to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #meat
Nowadays we can find types of deities of people
such
 as vegetarian. Based on vegetarians' point of view, they are sharing the opinion that we can maintain our health by just eating vegetables without meat.
However
, the other is saying we must consume meat as rich nutrition
that is
 good for our body. In the following ,sentences I am describing more detail with both perspectives.
To begin
 with,
Add an article
the
a
show examples
vegetable is raw materials that compound rich vitamin to help the working system of organs.
For instance
, vitamin A from carrot influences great contributions for eyes sensor and
then
 we can clear to see all things today.
Moreover
, we can not find the vitamin on meat materials as it is only in vegetables because it produces its food with assistance from chemistry natural sources
such
 as oxygen, sunshine, carbon dioxide, and so on.
In contrast
, raw from animals has critical components too for growing and developing our body and psychological
such
 as milk that shares magical drugs for increasing our height as its calcium part. To conclude, to be a vegetarian is choice depends on people, but please note we need complex nutritions for ourselves.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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