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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people suggest that young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the advantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this

#people #job #years #school #university
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There is an argument about the idea that youngsters would benefit from part-
time
Use synonyms
 occupation during the
time
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 between secondary education and university. in
this
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 essay, I will explain about advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 argument and give my own point of view. With regards to the benefits,
firstly
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 it helps people at young ages know the value of money and understands the favour of their parents did for providing family all the
time
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 and appreciate them.
Secondly
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, it makes them be prepared for living on their own since they can obtain partial financial independence. After that, it may help them about getting to know which kind of job they want to take in their future life so they can choose their major with the experience they gain.
On the other hand
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, because during
this
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time
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 they're usually students and mostly aren't expert in any job there is only a narrow range of basic jobs they can do.
For instance
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, as a waiter/waitress, food delivery, etc so they don't earn much money and it
also
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 faces them with
time
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 limitations for their social activities like hanging out with their friends which can lead to mental health issues. At the same
time
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, it can
also
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 have a
deteriorate
Change the form of the verb
deteriorating
show examples
 effect on their education since they'd be out of
time
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 and tired makes them fall behind with their studies and affect their future life. All in all, for students who work before
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 to higher educations if they'd be able to manage their
time
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, I think the benefits are outweighing the downsides far more.
Submitted by Amir Fakoori on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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