Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to secure a good job. Others believe that employers value work experience more than a university degree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #university #job #employers #value #work

It is not a secret that all people need, at some time in their life, begin to

work

dreaming to find a great job.

Nevertheless

, exist an interesting discussion about what the employers are looking for, university education or

work

experience

. In my opinion, it all depends on the nature of the position. Regarding different occupations is clear that certain jobs require

Change the article

show examples

academy

Replace the word

academic

show examples

degree

, sometimes a specialization or even a Master's

Degree

This

condition is clear in the recruitment processes, and for these ,jobs

Change preposition

with no

show examples

work

background can replace higher education. Examples of

such

occupations are doctors and engineers. A construction worker who has been working in the industry for ten years, will not become a civil engineer, no matter the

experience

that he has.

This

is because these professions require highly specialized knowledge that can only be acquired through many years of higher education.

On the other hand

, in some industries,

work

practice is more valuable than a

degree

For example

, in businesses

such

as insurance companies, some experienced sellers who only have secondary training, may be promoted to senior positions as

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Sales Managers, because they have a deep knowledge of how the department works. They clearly have a huge advantage over those with a

degree

who has just joined the company.

Therefore

, it is obvious that some jobs require extensive knowledge of the business, and in these cases, employers will prefer those with several years of

experience

over fresh academy graduates. In conclusion,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

apparently

Add a comma

,apparently

show examples

there is not a single way to obtain a great job. While a university

degree

is a prerequisite for some

position

Fix the agreement mistake

positions

show examples

work

experience

may be more important for others. I would highly recommend finding out what it is

Change the article

the

show examples

desired activity and knowing the requirements to be able to obtain it, can certainly help to make the best decision

Submitted by betsiecarmen on Tue Mar 01 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to secure a good job. Others believe that employers value work experience more than a university degree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think sending criminals to prison is not an effective way to deal with them. Education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Juvenile deliquency is on rise today. in our modern times , more and more adolescents are commiting crime. what are the possible reasons? is there any solution to this problem?