one of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Nowadays,when the world appears to have more and more strange diseases,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
improved medical
care
is really needed . People said that the increase of living longer and
life
expectancy brings both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
benefits and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
drawbacks. In my opinion,the
beneifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
benefit
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
improved medical
care
prevail over the disadvantages. Each of us spends our lives studying and working with the aim of enjoying our own results. We wish that we have a lot of
health
to love and take
care
of our loved ones.
For example
, when
life
expectancy is
increasingincreasingly
Correct your spelling
increasing increasingly
, grandparents could live longer with their children and grandchildren. Every year, the government spends a proportion of its budget on medical
care
and results. That will be the most effective way for humans to invent drugs and vaccines as more and more strange diseases appear.
Moreover
, scientists or professors with a huge amount of knowledge will continue to be taught
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
next
generation.
However
, being able to live longer
also
leads to some problems. It can be said that the job opportunities of young people and fresh graduates become lower when the job positions are still held by the old people.
Moreover
, the development of
health
care
also
means that if you want to live a long
life
, you have to spend a large amount of money to be able to take
care
of your
health
.
For example
, when you
havinge
Correct your spelling
having
have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cancer revenue, surgery and treatment
costs
Change the verb form
cost
show examples
a
lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
lot
show examples
of money.
Nevertheless
, it is your own
health
, having
health
is having everything. In conclusion,longer
life
expectancy far outweighs the disadvantages.
Life
is precious and we should spend money on medical
care
in any way possible.
Submitted by jakedth162 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consequences
  • improved medical care
  • life expectancy
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • healthcare
  • quality of life
  • population
  • economic burden
  • elderly
  • dependency
  • technology
  • ethical concerns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: