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Band 4.5

Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think this is the case? Is this good thing or a bad thing?

#people #clothes #case
In the 21st
century
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,century
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media is becoming
essential
Add an article
an essential
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 part of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
’s life. Day after day it is growing more to reach everyone on earth. Getting stuck with it
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 affects various aspects of
people
’s lifestyles. One of them is the way to dress up. Dressing up in
a
Correct determiner usage
one
show examples
 way or another reflects
people
’s identity.
However
, following
fashion
 trends is it good or bad?
Clothes
 act as a mirror that reflects the sense of
people
. Arranging, buying ,assorting and wearing
clothes
 reflects one’s identity.
However
, by the thrive of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
medial
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media
show examples
this
 is no more true for all cases. Some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 look up to celebrities’
clothe
Change the form of the verb
clothing
show examples
 as a
fashion
 that should be mimicked to stay updated. Others blindly wear seasonal
fashion
 trends regardless
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
 it suits them or not. I have friends
for example
 who wear
clothes
 that doesn’t
fits
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fit
show examples
 them correctly believing that since it is a trend they must follow regardless of their body shapes and their skin
color
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colour
show examples
.
On the other
hand
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,hand
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 some
people
 choose wisely which
clothes
 to wear and
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same time are fashionable and trendy. Wearing
elegant
Add an article
an elegant
show examples
 fashionable outfit that suits
people
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is a plus. Being
fashionable
Add an article
a fashionable
show examples
 person is mandatory to fit in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. Nowadays
fashion
 consultants are present to help
people
 wear suitable outfits that could combine
fashion
 and
person’s
Correct article usage
a person’s
show examples
 own taste.
As a
Change preposition
A
show examples
 sum up, following
fashion
 is not a shame but it should be accompanied by different steps. Which are choosing wisely what is suitable to dress as well asking professional consultants if needed for help
Submitted by dr.salmaasinno on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • express individuality
  • boost confidence
  • self-esteem
  • social status
  • designer labels
  • cultural icons
  • art and creativity
  • financial strain
  • overspend
  • fast fashion
  • culture of waste
  • economic growth
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