Life now is better than 100 years ago. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#life #years

Comparing the present and the past has always been a fascinating thing to do. Most people would say that living a decade ago pales in comparison to how it is now. I agree with

this

opinion as we can see that technological advances have been immense and the world is a safer place,

hence

it is, in fact, better now. First of all, it has always been a pattern for any species to evolve,

thus

for ,generations humans have tried to best their previous selves. The 1920s were a time that we focused more on industrialization and it was rightly so. For

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

instance, the Japanese were just competing with the Americans on who

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

produce more machinery. Compare it to today, where people work hand in hand to invent new things that will ease all beings on earth, no matter what they are and where they came from.

Secondly

, we were just rebuilding ourselves from the world war that lasted in the 1910s

Rephrase

apply

show examples

then

. Governments were ruled by the people who possessed the mightiest military force and their citizens were controlled by fear.

However

, humanities are focused on creating peace in the 21st century. We are governed by civilized leaders

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

together sit in the United

Nation

Fix the agreement mistake

Nations

show examples

with all the initiatives and programmes created to make the earth prosperous.

For example

, we can see the UN helping nations in conflicted areas and all countries compete to give their best resources. All things considered, I believe that life is better today. The key is how we work together as one, helping each other out to make as many breakthroughs as possible and breaking boundaries that were previously believed to be the maximum potential of humans.

Submitted by putraazhiz14 on Fri Mar 04 2022

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Overall feedback

Overall, you have addressed the prompt effectively by presenting reasons and examples to support your agreement with the statement. However, there are areas for improvement in task response, coherence, and cohesion, as detailed below.

Task Response

In terms of task response, make sure to directly engage with all parts of the prompt. While you have provided reasons to support your agreement, ensuring a balanced discussion by acknowledging potential counterarguments can strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. To enhance coherence and cohesion, focus on linking your ideas within and between paragraphs more explicitly. Consider using transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument smoothly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Life now is better than 100 years ago. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some say that these are the best people to talk to school students about the dangers of committing a crime? Do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and livable for people in those time than they are now. What problems will this cause ? What can be done to solve these problems ?

Nowadays in many countries chemicals are used to produce and preserve food. Do the advantages of this use outweigh the disadvantages?