IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Social media enable people to keep in touch with each other and learn about news events. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#media #people #touch #news #events
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In recent
years
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, social
media
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 and the Internet have caused people to be so close together
their
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that their
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 communication has become closer. As far as I am concerned,
this
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 is a beneficial approach, and its benefits are beyond its drawbacks.
And in
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In
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this
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 essay, I will explain some of these advantages and disadvantages.
To begin
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 with, one of the principal benefits is that social
media
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 are a time-efficient and economical way of communication. Because friends and relatives can talk or see each other without going out or spending money on transportation.
For example
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, we can contact our friends by video call on the Instagram application, and at the same time, we can see each other and speak.
Thus
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, these viable applications save more time and money for us.
Furthermore
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, another benefit of using social
media
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 is that it is comfortable to use. Since it provides various ranges of search engines and applications, individuals have been finding them highly desirable and user-friendly over
these
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the
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years
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.
For instance
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, we can find our friends on different apps,
such
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 as Twitter or Facebook, and follow their activities.
Moreover
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, one of the indispensable advantages of using social
media
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 is covering distances. To illustrate, family members have
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this
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the
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 facility to talk with each other when they are in other cities. Despite all these beneficial effects, there are a few negative points.
First,
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using social
media
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bring
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brings
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 loneliness and solitude in the long term. Because it is a virtual space
and
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apply
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overuse of it, leads us to an isolated situation. To cite an example, studies show that over 2 million citizens in Balk after using social
media
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 in the
last
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 3
years
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 suffer from depression.
In addition
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, one of the main drawbacks is that it makes us less thoughtful and creative. Because it is highly addictive and it will
have caused
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cause
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to
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them to
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 become less creative
by
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apply
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2 or three
years
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 later. In conclusion,
although
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 using social
media
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 has a few drawbacks, its benefits are greater than its disadvantages. And in my opinion, it is highly recommended and worthwhile to use it.
Submitted by nibbana333 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Include a more developed introduction and conclusion to provide a stronger framework for the essay.
task achievement
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