IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of the people and there is little can be done to rectify this. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#controls #media #attitudes #people
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21st
Correct article usage
The 21st
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 century is the century of connectedness and openness.
This
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 is really has become obvious after spreading
of
Change preposition
apply
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the
media
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 ways like TV programs,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 and recently the big explosion of social
media
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 websites and devices. We have been destined into a world of no bars and no borders. Whoever controls the
media
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also
Linking Words
 controls
opinions
Correct article usage
the opinions
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 and attitudes of
people
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.
This
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 is true when we talked about websites that monitor the searching words of their
customors
Correct your spelling
customers
 in order to show advertisements and suggested web pages of usual and common used words. Another example of how
media
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 control the attitude of
people
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 is that
media
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 control the amount and the quality of information
that is
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
spread
spreaded
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spread
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 between
people
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 about
specific
Add an article
a specific
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 subject, rendering other
subject
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subjects
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 and
elevate
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elevating
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 the value of some information
resource
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resources
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 over others.
However
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, not only the conscious mind has
playing
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played
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 a role in controlling
people
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.
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Also
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,Also
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 the unconscious mind is affected
also
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 by managing what is repeated in terms of heard words and seen pictures. As we can see
that
Correct determiner usage
the
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 tremendous effect of
media
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 on
people
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that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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can be explained by many reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, It is a fast way of spreading information or even life events of
people
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, which creates what is normal and what is common between
people
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. Another reason is the widespread
media
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 resources ranging from photos, computers, books, or even TV or radio programs.
Linking Words
Moreover
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,Moreover
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 it's easy to use for old
people
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 and even children.
People
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 need that distance between
them
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themselves
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 and
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themselves
theirselves
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themselves
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 in order to have that critique and observing eye of their thoughts, their norms and their beliefs. With no
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doubt
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doubts
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,doubts
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these
Correct determiner usage
this
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 new
media
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 technology has brought many benefits to human
people
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 need more awareness in order not to let anyone control their lives and their goals through it.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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