Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion?

#money #time

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Wealth is an imperative aspect of our

life

Use synonyms

. So some believe it is good to have high finances and poor time

whereas

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others think that more span and low pay is beneficial.I believe the latter is much

beneficial

Correct quantifier usage

more beneficial

show examples

when it comes to living a happy

life

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both views in detail

along with

Linking Words

relevant examples and personal opinions that will be provided in the end.

To begin

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, higher financial status makes people time poor because they become financially strong which gives them a sense of achievement in their

life

Use synonyms

. To explain

further

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, they are busy making wealth to fulfil their dreams and desires which can be their goal for a lifetime.

For instance

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, recent studies have shown that 90% of millionaires don't waste their hours on leisure activities because of their busy

schedule

Fix the agreement mistake

schedules

show examples

which can make them less productive.

To conclude

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, people can gain supremacy

through

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show examples

spending

much moment

Fix the agreement mistake

many moments

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creating capital rather than chilling at home.

On the other hand

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, low funds but more experiences with

closed

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show examples

folks

such

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as friends and family is what a person needs to live a happy

life

Use synonyms

Furthermore

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, money can't buy happiness as everyone says which is, in fact, true because human, a social

animal

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animals

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and needs an occasion to relax and rejuvenate.

For example

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, numerous pieces of evidence show that working individuals who spend more space with their children or family members are less likely to suffer from mental illnesses.

To sum up

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, one should build relationships by spending maximum duration with their loved ones. In conclusion, Duration and funding are the two most important contributing factors for a happy future and

this

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essay

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

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discussed both notions in depth. In my opinion, wealth is a crucial factor

to determine

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in determining

show examples

a better future for an individual that can't be attained by sitting idle.

Submitted by jayasingh352 on Sun Mar 06 2022

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coherence cohesion

Ensure a clear and balanced discussion of both views in the introduction and conclusion. Present a thesis statement that clearly states your opinion.

task achievement

Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support your main points. Link your ideas more explicitly to improve coherence and cohesion.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
facilitating
lifestyle
professional development
increased stress
work-life balance
hobbies
quality time
physical and mental health
financial constraints
luxury items
overall well-being
personal growth
middle ground
sacrificing

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