IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some think government spending on infrastructure (transport, housing etc) is considered the most important for a nation. While others believe that education, health and HR values more important areas for government expenditure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#think #government #infrastructure #transport #nation #education #health #hr #values #areas #expenditure
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Some argue
Use synonyms
government
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the government
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 should invest in building infrastructure whereas others believe providing
education
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, medical and
job
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opportunities
Use synonyms
 is much more important for a
country
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.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion,
state's
Correct article usage
the state's
show examples
first
Linking Words
 priority is to provide ample access to
education
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 and medical services for everyone. Making life easier and
comfortable
Correct quantifier usage
more comfortable
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 for every citizen might be the reason behind people belief who think spending on infrastructure is crucial for a nation. In developing countries where
majority
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the majority
a majority
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 of
population
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the population
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 belongs to
middle
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the middle
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 class who are not able to buy a car or other vehicle,
then
Linking Words
 it is the responsibility of
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 to provide cheaper transportation services so that they can commute to their workplace and home by just paying little money.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
for
Change preposition
apply
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a person with
average
Correct article usage
an average
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 income who can only
fufill
Correct your spelling
fulfil
 his basic needs
such
Linking Words
 as clothes and
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
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 cannot even think of buying
home
Correct article usage
a home
show examples
.
Hence
Linking Words
 some think,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
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 should
also
Linking Words
 invest
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 housing for
much needed
Add a hyphen
much-needed
show examples
 people.
On the other hand
Linking Words
who
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 supports the view that
government
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 emphasizes should be on creating more educational
institute
Fix the agreement mistake
institutes
show examples
, hospitals, and better
job
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opportunities
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 for its public . Because it is
basic
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a basic
the basic
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 right of every citizen to get
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education
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an education
the education
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 and good health facilities. Investing in industries
also
Linking Words
 develop the
job
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opportunities
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 between the younger population who will ultimately contribute
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Correct article usage
the nations
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nations
Change noun form
nation's
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 economy and will make effort to
built
Wrong verb form
build
show examples
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 future for their
country
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. There is no doubt,
healthy
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a healthy
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 and educated population is
further
Linking Words
assets
Fix the agreement mistake
asset
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 of a
country
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.
Hence
Linking Words
 it is
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
government
Change noun form
government's
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 primary responsibility to make efforts in the betterment of
education
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 and medical systems. To conclude, good hospitals, free
education
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 and
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of
job
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opportunities
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 will benefit the
country
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 so
government
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 should invest in these sectors
first
Linking Words
.
Submitted by kalraharman6 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • job creation
  • foreign investments
  • business operations
  • traffic congestion
  • pollution
  • quality of life
  • homelessness
  • affordable living conditions
  • knowledgeable workforce
  • skilled workforce
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • public health
  • life expectancy
  • burden of diseases
  • employee satisfaction
  • employee retention
  • long-term benefits
  • immediate economic gains
What to do next:
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