IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the advantage and disadvantage of tourist who visits such places?

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the first problem that needs to be considered is the purpose of travelling. It
is
Wrong verb form
was
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such
 an incredible moment when people decided to choose a complex destination to have a vacation. Many other tourism boards offer a beautiful track,
scenery
Correct word choice
and scenery
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, for ,instance to be visited by all family members. The transportation, the energy, and the money for these activities should be ready for any kind of reason. in general, the real issue is
good
Correct article usage
the good
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 and bad aspects of these travel phenomena. For some groups of teenagers and nature lovers, they make their holidays
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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delightful by challenging the body and the soul.
for example
, they are joining a summer holiday
to
Change preposition
in
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 a rural area in a certain country. It will have a lot of risky places and accidents.
However
, they are satisfied and want several times to challenge their adrenaline.
Moreover
, our society is encouraged to bring their bravery to face the real
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
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 around them. the main advantage is that society could have an uncommon memory.
Overall
, the solution is just to give them the opportunity to access the risky area of travelling but they have to understand the procedure.
For most
Change preposition
Most
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 populations who are excited and curious to have the best moment of their vacations,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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could deal with some cruel schedules of tourism.
Although
 it is not going to be easy, the offerings of travel agents are available for a community already stated.
Likewise
, they may be prepared for some
precaution
Replace the word
precautionary
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 standards, special guidances and jackets that can be used to protect their body safely.
Instead
 of the moment to enjoy the travelling, our community should plan
as well as
 possible
alike
Rephrase
apply
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as the itinerary must be well organized and scheduled by the agency. in conclusion, the beneficial
aspects
Fix the agreement mistake
aspect
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 for a traveller who
decided
Wrong verb form
decides
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 to go to challenging places, they will have the best experiences. meanwhile, the worst aspect that we have to
be considered
Wrong verb form
consider
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 is the risk of danger.
Subsequently
, we must guarantee life-saving and have life insurance regarding our planning to visit the destination.

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the given topic and provides a clear and comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
Improve the organization and coherence of the essay by using clear transition words and linking ideas together more effectively.
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