Some people say that allowing children to make their own choices on every day matters (such as food, clothes,and entertainment)is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

#people #children #choices #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decisions

Some

individual

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individuals

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think that it is important for

children

to make decisions related to some important matters.

However

,other

people

say that if allowing to

children

to make their own

choices

daily things it involves food, clothes, entertainments result of

this

children

became bossy and stubborn. I completely agree with

first

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the first

show examples

statement and I have justified my view in

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

paragraph.

To begin

with, I believe that,

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the decision

show examples

decision making

Add a hyphen

decision-making

show examples

process is

key

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a key

show examples

role in

people

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people's

show examples

life. Whatever

children

allowing to make their own

choices

such

as food,

chothes

Correct your spelling

clothes

, entertainment, becoming friends, lifestyle and so on.It creates

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

impact on

children

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children's

show examples

mind

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minds

show examples

.In

Remove the article

apply

show examples

childhood,

children

make

theirown

Correct your spelling

their own

decision

reason of

this

in older age

children

become a selfish and they only think about himself.

Children

make their own

choices

it is possible they have

misbehave

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misbehaved

show examples

older

people

and

also

their

parents

. Sometimes

children

choose a bad way to improve their

negatives

Replace the word

negative

show examples

skills .

Moreover

children

choose their own path by own

decision

making it is bad for her family and society too.

Example

Correct article usage

An example

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

this

, one boy studied in school . They have

take

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taken

show examples

money

Add an article

the money

show examples

Change preposition

from

show examples

his friend without his permission and their

parents

did not

Stopped

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Stop

show examples

even he theft money in

bank

Add an article

the bank

show examples

Hence

children

make their

decision

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

choices

sometimes it is

negative

Add an article

a negative

the negative

show examples

impact on their future.

On the other hand

, some

people

say that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

make

Wrong verb form

making

show examples

Add an article

a decision

show examples

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

show examples

sometime

Correct your spelling

sometimes

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

is better for their self-development.

Children

creates

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create

show examples

good

decision

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decisions

show examples

for their career . result of

this

, They can

achieved

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achieve

show examples

more confidence and never go down in any situation in their life . Example of. In a country

Correct your spelling

Parents

allowing

Wrong verb form

allow

show examples

her

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

children

to make

Add an article

a decision

show examples

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

show examples

freely . So ,

children

can improve their skills and abilities. They cannot face any kind of fear in life . In conclusion

Change the punctuation

show examples

It is important to

allowing

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allow

show examples

children

to make their own

choices

however

, it is better to make decisions on

parents

Change noun form

parents'

parent's

show examples

guidence

Correct your spelling

guidance

. I strongly agree with

first

Change the article

the first

show examples

statement .

Submitted by writingpractice233 on Thu Mar 10 2022

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

327 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Autonomy
Consequence-awareness
Self-centered
Informal decision-making education
Child development
Age-appropriate choices
Cognitive growth
Fostering independence
Parental guidance
Societal norms
Interpersonal consideration
Balance of freedom
Individualism versus collectivism
Experience-based learning

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Some people say that allowing children to make their own choices on every day matters (such as food, clothes,and entertainment)is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not well-managed. What are the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world? Do you think that the benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks?

More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?

More people are shopping online today than ever before. Why do people choose to shop this way? Are there any disadvantages to shopping online?

Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?