Some people think news has no connection to people’s lives, so it is a waste of time to read news in the newspaper and watch news programs on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over whether there is no worth
to read
Change the verb form
reading
show examples
and
watch
Wrong verb form
watching
show examples
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
.
While
it has its own
perk
Fix the agreement mistake
perks
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, I would contend that it has both pros and cons. Without a shadow of a doubt, new plays
such
a paramount indispensable role in citizen’s lives. Receiving
news
helps people know more about
recents
Correct your spelling
recent
events in distinct aspects
everyday
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every day
show examples
.
For example
, people who take a keen interest in
sport
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sports
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will watch sports
news
such
as football,
while
businessmen would be interested in economics
news
.
Hence
, dwellers can update all things and activities around the world through
news
.
While
the redeeming feature of
news
is widely acknowledged, its counterpart still lingers. There are thousands of
news
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
but not all of them are true because some criminals might write posts in order to lead trusting inhabitants through the nose.
For instance
, celebrities tend to be victims of villains who create
rumors
Change the spelling
rumours
show examples
and negative posts about them to push them down.
Thus
, not all
news
may be useful and factual. In conclusion, connecting to the
news
might help people update everything around the world instantly but they may have undesirable consequences to somebody's life.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines your stance on the topic, and your conclusion succinctly summarizes your viewpoint, reinforcing the importance of the discussion.
Task Achievement
Increase the clarity and specificity of your examples to more effectively illustrate your points. Consider providing real-life scenarios or statistical information to make your argument more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop a more logical flow between paragraphs by using cohesive devices effectively and ensuring each paragraph has a clear main idea followed by supporting sentences.
Task Achievement
Try to delve deeper into the implications of the argument you are presenting. Discuss not only the immediate effects but also the possible long-term consequences to enhance the depth of your analysis.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial
  • informed
  • current events
  • platform
  • discussion
  • engagement
  • informed decisions
  • diversity
  • sense of community
  • biased
  • sensationalized
  • overwhelming
  • stressful
  • consumption
  • balanced
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