Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination,while other think that tere are more important factors such as money and appearance.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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I n
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In
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recent years
its
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it
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been a topic of debate among people on what makes someone successful in
life
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. Some are of the opinion that success only comes from hard work and
determination
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,
while
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others believe that it depends on other factors
such
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as money and
appearance
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.In
this
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essay I will be discussing both views and why I totally agree with the first notion.
To begin
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with, Nowadays we live in a materialistic world where most individuals judge others based on their
look
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looks
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and bank account. Having good fortune means being able to buy the best clothes having the ability to purchase the most beautiful houses and having access to the best services and education.
Therefore
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most people will assume that because that person is successful in his or her
life
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they are able to enjoy
life
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to the fullest.
Moreover
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, we can not deny that a person's
appearance
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is a key factor
to
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in
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succeed
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success
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in some sectors. For ,instance the modelling industry having a good look and
fit
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a fit
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body is essential to be successful.
However
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, we can not base success only on
appearance
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and money,
beautie
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beauty
standers
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standards
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vary from one person to another,
also
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being welthe
do
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does
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not necessarily correlate with success many people are born into rich families. There are other key factors that make someone successful.
Firstly
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, being passionate about something will give us the power to stand up after each failure.
Moreover
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,
determination
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enables us to overcome difficulties and obstacles.
For example
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, MARIE CURIE was able to finish her late husband's work through
determination
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and because of
that
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that,
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she became a pioneer in the
physic
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physics
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failed.
Furthermore
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having self-discipline helps us to focus on our goals and it provides us with rules to live effectively.And
last
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but not least having the willingness to acquire knowledge is
also
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important to succeed in
life
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. In conclusion,
Although
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money and
appearance
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will give a head start in some sectors. passion,
determination
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, discipline, and working hard to achieve certain goals are the key elements to
succeed
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success
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in
life
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.
Submitted by ph.amal.just on

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Task Response
In the introduction, ensure to clearly present both views and your own opinion. Maintain a balance in discussing both perspectives.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Use linking words and cohesive devices to connect your ideas more effectively.
Lexical Resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely. Avoid repetition and aim for more variety in lexical choices.
Grammatical Range
Work on the accuracy and complexity of your sentences. Vary sentence structures and be mindful of grammatical errors.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • multifaceted
  • determination
  • humble beginnings
  • long-term goals
  • influential networks
  • public image
  • societal standards
  • amplify opportunities
  • foundational
  • crucial
  • exemplifying
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