People should look after their health because this is a duty to the society not just a personal benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often said that considering
health
is an obligation to society instead
of a personal advantage. From my point of view ,I personally agree with this
idea. I am going to explain some reasons below.
Firstly
,one of the main reasons is encouraging human beings to have a healthy lifestyle
. For example
,in most countries all around the world where people are accepting healthy things ,those who are not interested in having a healthy lifestyle
prefer to obey this
situation. This
could help the community to accept this
significant thing. Moreover
,this
could create a situation of being healthy among all human beings. Therefore
,this
makes it clear why this
can bring some benefits to society rather than personal advantages.
Secondly
,another conspicuous reason is the impact on countries. For instance
,we all know in some countries those who are suffering from some health
problems such
as obesity are not capable to conduct
their work effortlessly. Change preposition
of conducting
This
is a persuasive reason to consider having a healthy lifestyle
is significant to the community. Additionally
,to accept
looking after to Verb problem
apply
health
, can bring many upsides to areas where they settling . As a result
,it becomes apparent there are numerous causes that can not be ignored.
To summarise ,I strongly agree with the idea that having a healthy lifestyle
is significant and necessary not just for individuals but also
,this
is crucial to society. It is recommended that governments and ordinary people start encouraging their residents to look after their health
.Submitted by maede.sadeghi8520 on
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task response
To improve task response, ensure that you address all parts of the prompt clearly in your essay. Expand on the reasons why looking after health benefits society as a whole, not just individuals.
coherence and cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, work on strengthening the introduction and conclusion of your essay. Make sure they clearly introduce and summarize the main points of your argument. Also, use transition words and phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs.