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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people have argued that there will be no need for art galleries in the future because people can view works of art freely on the internet. Compare and contrast the benefits of viewing art in real life with viewing it on the internet. In your opinion, which is better? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #art #galleries #future #works #internet #contrast #life
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DEPENDING ON RECENT TECHNOLOGICAL DEVELOPMENTS, IT IS ARGUED THAT PEOPLE WILL PREFER TO EXPLORE THE WORLD OF
ART
Use synonyms
 VIA
INTERNET
Correct article usage
THE INTERNET
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WITH
Change preposition
AT
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 NO CHARGE,
INSTEAD
Linking Words
 OF PHYSICALLY VISITING
ART
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 GALLERIES OR MUSEUMS.
FURTHERMORE
Linking Words
, IT IS CLAIMED THAT
ART
Use synonyms
 GALLERIES AND MUSEUMS WILL BE UNNECESSARY IN THE FUTURE.
THIS
Linking Words
 ESSAY WILL EXPLAIN WHY I DISAGREE WITH
THIS
Linking Words
 STATEMENT AND WHAT ARE THE REASONS
OF
Change preposition
FOR
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THIS
Linking Words
 DECISION.
FIRST
Linking Words
 OF ALL, MUSEUMS OR GALLERIES ARE NOT JUST BUILDINGS TO DISPLAY SOME IMPORTANT PIECES. THESE BUILDINGS CREATE AN ENVIRONMENT FOR PEOPLE TO SOCIALIZE WITH OTHER PEOPLE HAD
SAME
Correct article usage
THE SAME
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 INTERESTS OR EXPERTS
ON
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IN
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 THAT FIELD,
MOREOVER
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, GIVE HUMAN BEINGS
CHANCE
Correct article usage
A CHANCE
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 TO FEEL THE
ART
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 THROUGH THEIR FIVE SENSES.
FOR INSTANCE
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, DURING A PHOTOGRAPH
EXHIBITON
Correct your spelling
EXHIBITION
 TOUR, IT CAN BE MET WITH
PHOTOGRAPHER
Correct article usage
THE PHOTOGRAPHER
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 AND
LISTENED
Add the preposition
TOLISTENED
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 THE STORIES BEHIND OF SHOOTS FROM THE
FIRST
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MOUTH
Correct your spelling
MONTH
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.
IN ADDITION
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, THE PHOTOGRAPHS MAY BE FULLY APPRECIATED, THANKS TO BACKGROUND TUNES OR
ODOR
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THE ODOR
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 OF
ROOM
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THE ROOM
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 IN WHICH ARE CHOSEN BY PHOTOGRAPHERS.
ON THE OTHER HAND
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, VISITING HISTORICAL OR ARTISTIC PLACES WITH THE
USING
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USE
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 OF
INTERNET
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THE INTERNET
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 CAN ENLARGE THE
AMOUNT
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NUMBER
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 OF VISITORS DUE TO FREE ENTRANCE AND NO PHYSICAL REPLACEMENT REQUIRED. DESPITE TO THESE ADVANTAGES,
THIS
Linking Words
 ONLINE EXPERIENCE CAN NOT REPLACE WITH BEING IN THE SAME AMBIANCE WITH THE
Use synonyms
ART WORKS
Correct your spelling
ARTWORKS
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.
IN ADDITION
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 TO LACK OF SENSATION, THERE IS AN INFORMATION POLLUTION ON WEBSITES. TO ILLUSTRATE, AT THE BEGINNING OF ISOLATION, IT WAS FREE TO VISIT LOUVRE MUSEUM ONLINE FOR ONE DAY AND NEEDLESS TO SAY I IMMEDIATELY SUBMITTED
TO
Correct pronoun usage
IT TO
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WEBSITE
Correct article usage
THE WEBSITE
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. BUT I HAVE TO ADMIT IT WAS NOT IMPRESSED ME BECAUSE OF
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THE ABSENT
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ABSENT
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ABSENCE
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A
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OF A
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TOUR GUIDE, LACK OF SENSATIONS
SUCH
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 AS SMELL OR HEARING OF THE ATMOSPHERE. TO CONCLUDE, DESPITE
OF
Remove the preposition
apply
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THE EXCLUSIVE OPPORTUNITIES IT PROVIDES, SINCE
ART
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 LOVERS WILL CONTINUE TO COME TOGETHER IN BUILDINGS OR PLACES IN THE FUTURE, ONLINE EXPERIENCE WILL NEVER TAKE OVER PHYSICAL TOUR.
Submitted by dt.essrademir on

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