Longer line spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives. In what ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
It is shown that elderly
people
above 60-years old have longer line spans and developments in their health with living full and active lives. I believe that it can be considered positive aspects in providing workforces and reducing a medical expenditure expended by governments
.
One of the advantages for
older Change preposition
of
people
’s participation in society as a whole is that community
can obtain a greater Correct article usage
the community
number
of workforces with elderly people
working. Nowadays, there are several industries whose number
of workers is too poor to product
their productions. Replace the word
produce
For example
, in the agricultural industries, according to a public survey, 80% of its owners can not find enough large number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
people
to cultivate their productions
Replace the word
products
such
as vegetables and fruits. If elderly people
can engage with such
sectors, the issue, a lack of labor
, can be solved, which will benefit society as a whole.
Change the spelling
labour
As
Change preposition
On
another
positive side, it can be said that amount of Correct determiner usage
the
a
medical expenditure allocated as one of the public Correct article usage
apply
services
by governments
will be declined
in the case of an increased Replace the word
decline
number
of healthy older people
. This
trend brings the
opportunities for Correct article usage
apply
governments
to spend their budgets on the
other public Correct article usage
apply
services
. To illustrate this
, in a certain city’s report, 40% of cities can increase the budget for educational services
reduced their cost for a medical issue of the elderly people
by providing healthy exercises to them. Thus
, if elderly citizens can become more live full and active lives, they will reduce to require a
medical support as Remove the article
apply
the
public service. It can lead to raising Correct article usage
a
a
Correct article usage
the
number
of the other public services
given by governments
.
In conclusion, older citizens’ longer line spans and enhancements of their health benefit
society as a whole in terms of raising a figure for workers and developing the other public Change the noun form
benefits
services
.Submitted by 100nami.d on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite