Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

#television #children #two #five #support

Even though there is a popular agreement that

television

advertising directed towards young

children

aged

two

five

should be allowed to keep them entertained, I have a different opinion. I totally disagree with

this

. I feel

this

way for

two

reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

To begin

with, it is critically important to inhibit

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

age

Wrong verb form

aged

show examples

two

five

watching

Change preposition

from watching

show examples

television

advertising because the

kids

cannot distingue if the advertisements are exaggerated which can lead to accidents. Some advertisements only want to sell their products without thinking about safety. My personal experience is a compelling example of

this

. About 10 years ago, my relative wanted to buy a

spiderman

Capitalize word

Spiderman

show examples

outfit because he thought he would jump like a

spiderman

Capitalize word

Spiderman

show examples

and when he got the outfit, in the beginning, he started jumping on the table. Unfortunately, one day he jumped from upstairs to downstairs.

Moreover

this

made

Verb problem

caused

show examples

him

got

Wrong verb form

to get into

show examples

an accident by breaking his legs. He needed to stay in a hospital for almost a month and missed school. I am sure if his parent had not let him watch

television

advertising,

this

situation would not have happened.

Therefore

, avoiding

children

aged

two

five

watching

television

is greater than watching because

kids

do not know what is the reality of just the performance. Another obvious reason is that some families have a financial problem that they are not able to afford toys because toys are expensive to be safe for the

kids

, so they always produce

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

good material.

For instance

, One of my friends, she has 2

kids

. She always

let

Wrong verb form

lets

show examples

her

kids

watch

television

. She kept telling me that when the big sister wanted the doll toy, the little boy wanted the car toy

also

because they

are

Wrong verb form

were

show examples

jealous.

This

made my friend

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

exhausted because she is a

stayed home

Correct your spelling

stay-at-home

show examples

mom ,so her husband is the only one who earns money.

Furthermore

, I gave her some advice that tried not to let the

kids

watch

television

because

television

influences the

kids

that they are not able to distingue.

As a result

, letting the

kids

watch

television

will make

Correct article usage

the

show examples

financial become unstable. In conclusion, for all the reasons stated above, I encourage all parents

should

Verb problem

apply

show examples

not be

allowed

Wrong verb form

allow

show examples

children

aged

two

five

to watch

television

advertising. If they do

this

then

they will discover for themselves that avoiding

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

television

will

have

Verb problem

cause

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

countless number of reducing

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

financial

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

and

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical emergency

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

Submitted by mafrey_playgirl on Mon Mar 14 2022

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coherence and cohesion

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task achievement

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Word Count

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

415 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Word Count

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

Some people say schools should be responsible for teaching young adults to look after their health, others think this is not the responsibility of schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Rich Countries often give money to poorer countries but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than Financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People have different views on how to reduce traffic congestion. Some think that governments should build more train and subway lines, while others think that building more roads and widening existing roads will reduce traffic congestion. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.