Some people think that mental strength is the most important factor for success in sports. However, some others believe that it is more important to have strong and fit people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

#people #strength #factor #success #sports

There are controversial perspectives heating a debate over crucial factors

sporting

Change preposition

in sporting

show examples

games to getting success.

While

people hold a strong view that mental

strength

plays

such

most

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

paramount vital role in

this

path, the opposite makes a statement that being strong and fit is more imperative.

Although

each has its own perks, I would contend that it is optimal to combine both mentioned elements. Without a shadow of a doubt, mental

strength

is one of the most necessary factors to become a successful athlete, especially for their long-term career. That might be because all athletes in different kinds of sports have not only to practice hard and even consistently but

also

to get into a myriad of injuries so a rigid and enduring mental health can greatly assist them to conquer their goal and become successful.

For instance

, Le Tu Chinh ,who is one of the

fastest running

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fastest-running

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athletes in VietNam,

still

Add a missing verb

is still

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engaged in the Sea Game and achieved second position despite an urgent knee injury from a year ago.

That is

due to

her mental

strength

to keep

practicing

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practising

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and running to recover after a surgeon so that she can obtain her ambition and become more and more famous.

Hence

, mental

strength

is a crucial element that every athlete needs to possess.

On the other hand

strength

and fitness

also

have a dominant contribution to people’s management in the sports field.It is explicit to note that they can have

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apply

show examples

great support in

athlete’s

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athletes’

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practice and their enhance-skill process with less time consumed. Nguyen Thi Anh Vien, who is one of the most customary female swimmers in Vietnam, can be cited as a remarkable example. With superior physical health, she soon had a chance to be selected to a national team in the Sea Game and won the highest prize at an early age.

Thus

, being strong and fit is

also

an essential aspect

to become

Change preposition

of becoming

show examples

a successful athlete. In conclusion, it is ideal for people to combine both mental and physical

strength

to get success in every type of sport.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Tue Mar 15 2022

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introduction

Your introduction is clear and sets up the discussion well, but consider rephrasing for greater clarity. For example, 'There are controversial perspectives on the factors that contribute to success in sports. Some argue that mental strength is paramount, while others believe that physical fitness is more essential.'

conclusion

Your conclusion is succinct and ties the discussion together, but try to restate the main points for fuller closure. For instance, 'In conclusion, while both mental and physical strengths are vital, their combination is the key to achieving success in sports.'

supporting examples

You have provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, such as mentioning Le Tu Chinh's mental strength and Nguyen Thi Anh Vien's physical fitness. This strengthens your arguments considerably.

task completion

Your essay demonstrates a clear and comprehensive response to the task, considering both perspectives and presenting a balanced view.

logical structure

You've generally maintained good coherence in your ideas and transitions, making your essay easy to follow.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

343 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

7.5

Introduction & conclusion present

7.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

7.5

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

7.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that mental strength is the most important factor for success in sports. However, some others believe that it is more important to have strong and fit people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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