Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Technology improvement has a prominent impact on society,
for
instance
Add a comma
instance,
show examples
doing work from home or online study is possible nowadays.
As the
Correct word choice
The
show examples
refining of online systems in both prices and accessibility
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
remote activity
become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
more available, which altered modern society's perspective towards online activity. I believe
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
transformation has its own advantages and disadvantages. The most influenced by
this
change is efficiency,
such
as time and money usage. Time management will be easier to conduct since people will be doing their job and learning in their homes,
therefore
they will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not waste time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
driving.
In addition
, they could use it to do the task or study
instead
of driving. In terms of money, the labour and student would save the gas bill.
Moreover
, the lunch could be done in their home,
hence
it will save the meal budget.
On the other hand
, doing work or studying remotely would
bring
Verb problem
have
show examples
immense
Correct article usage
an immense
show examples
effect
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
direct socializing. Since they will not interact directly, it would
make
Verb problem
create
show examples
a huge gap in communication skills. Even though, communication could be done by video conference and chatting. It is still different from face-to-face socializing. Where you could feel the warm chat and body contact with your partner or engage in the group task with your peer
for example
. Those simple interactions would lead to a better bond between people.
Whereas
, online interaction has
scarcity
Correct article usage
a scarcity
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
physical contact. In conclusion, remote working or class has its own advantages and disadvantages. I believe
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the online system would lead society to a brighter era as long as we could use it wisely.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Ensure to fully address the prompt and provide a balanced argument on whether working and studying from home is positive or negative. Include specific examples to support your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement and the conclusion is brief. Try to structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs with supporting details, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote work
  • telecommuting
  • work-life balance
  • environmental impact
  • socio-economic background
  • face-to-face interaction
  • interpersonal skills
  • productivity
  • reliable technology
  • quality of education
  • flexible schedule
  • cost savings
  • commuting
What to do next:
Look at other essays: