IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

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Although
Linking Words
 these days
agriculture
Use synonyms
 has developed
quickly
Correct quantifier usage
more quickly
show examples
 than past, a lot of
people
Use synonyms
 still
are struggle
Change the verb form
are struggling
show examples
 with starvation. In the essay, I will explain the reasons caused the situation and give some
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 to improve
this
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 issue. The
first
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 reason is the imbalance between regional agricultural development. The climate, altitude, even the distance far away from
river
Add an article
the river
a river
show examples
 or other main water resources made every place has different conditions for
agriculture
Use synonyms
. One of the most significant
case
Change to a plural noun
cases
show examples
 is
African
Correct article usage
the African
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 area, due to its climate, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
crops
Add an article
the crops
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 can not be cultivated here, so even
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
Correct your spelling
worldwide
show examples
world wide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
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 has the advances made in
agriculture
Use synonyms
, these countries have not. That
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 those
people
Use synonyms
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there do not have enough corps to meet their needs.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the imbalance between
agriculture
Use synonyms
 development and population expansion is another cause of
people
Use synonyms
 are suffering
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 hunger,
such
Linking Words
 as India which has the largest population in the world and has
good
Add an article
a good
the good
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condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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 for
cultivate
Change the verb form
cultivating
show examples
 plants. To release the situation, a single country
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not have
ability
Change the article
the ability
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 to fix it, all the governments and international institutions need
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
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 a sharing policy aim
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
prevent
Change the verb form
preventing
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people
Use synonyms
 from going hungry.
For instance
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, having a reasonable export and import system to help
those country
Change the determiner
that country
those countries
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 can not make
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 citizens have enough food alone.
Then
Linking Words
, its own authorities should encourage their
people
Use synonyms
 to learn high-tech for
agriculture
Use synonyms
 and promote
those technology
Change the determiner
that technology
those technologies
show examples
 widely, like using machines to sow or cultivate crops
instead
Linking Words
 of
by
Correct your spelling
my
show examples
 hands and raise their awareness of each career is same essential for society. In conclusion, I reiterate my belief that the imbalance of different
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 caused large
people
Use synonyms
 still in hunger, and the whole world and those countries
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
 suffering
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 those issues need to work together to fix
this
Linking Words
 problem.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
What to do next:
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