IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people want government to spend money on searching for life on other planets. However, others think it is a waste of public money when the earth has so many problems. Discuss these two views and give your own opinion.

#people #government #money #life #planets #waste #earth #two
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These day
Change the determiner
This day
These days
show examples
, more and more governments start to invest
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 area: explore whether other
life
Use synonyms
existing
Wrong verb form
exists
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 or not
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other planets. Some
people
Use synonyms
are support
Change the verb form
are supporting
show examples
this
Linking Words
 proposal, while others argue that it is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
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 of the
taxation
Replace the word
taxes
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 they paid since there are more serious issues
need
Correct pronoun usage
that need
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 to address. In my opinion, I agree with that using public money should
to
Change the verb form
apply
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spend on current problems rather than finding new
life
Use synonyms
. From
people
Use synonyms
 who think it is necessary to search for
life
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
from
show examples
 other planets’
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
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, it is generally accepted that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 would run out of resources on the earth one day, so finding a new place as a backup is essential. And if authorities could find
life
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 other parts of the universe, the fact
indicate
Change the verb form
indicates
show examples
 that human
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 another option to move to.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is a way to prevent
people
Use synonyms
 from the
threaten
Replace the word
threat
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of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
unknown creatures. As the assumption that
people
Use synonyms
 are considered by other
life
Use synonyms
 as lower animals, taking acts
first
Linking Words
 could be a protection for
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, others claim that
instead
Linking Words
 of spending public money on searching for
life
Use synonyms
 on other planets, authorities should pay more attention to other fields, and improve those
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
 to solve the
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
higher priority issues,
such
Linking Words
 as educational and medicinal
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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. To cite an example as education, having more governments' financial support can make those
illiteracy
Replace the word
illiterate
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 become more affordable to get the higher education and find a job to meet their ends.
Moreover
Linking Words
, if they invest
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 medicine, like
purchase
Wrong verb form
purchasing
show examples
 more medical machines and
encourage
Wrong verb form
encouraging
show examples
professional
Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
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 to carry out more research on those diseases that can not solve by present technical, like cancer, can increase the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 have well-being and
Correct your spelling
decrease
show examples
decease
Correct your spelling
decrease
show examples
 the mortality rate. In conclusion, I reiterate my belief that governments should spend money on issues that
just
Add a missing verb
are just
show examples
 under
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 noses at present, rather than giving funds to a proposal that may take a long time to
proof
Replace the word
prove
show examples
 its merits.
Submitted by baozilyn on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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