Some people think that the Olympics is no longer important in the 21st century. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #olympics #st #century

It is argued that

Olympics

Correct article usage

the Olympics

show examples

have been losing their importance

along

Change preposition

over

show examples

the centuries, until becoming irrelevant nowadays. In my opinion, I disagree that

Olympic

Correct article usage

the Olympic

show examples

games

lost their importance in the world where we live in. I support

this

point of view for two main reasons. To commence with the

first

reason, these

games

represent an excellent way to bring

people

together. Indeed, it is very common for families or friends to watch

Olympic

games

together, while having lunch or dinner

for example

In addition

to that,

Olympics

Correct article usage

the Olympics

show examples

manage to gather

people

together at a more profound level, by awakening and enhancing strong feelings of patriotism and brotherhood among citizens.

For instance

, when

last

year an Italian athlete won the 100 mt

Olympic

race, we were all very proud of him, but especially we were proud of being Italians. Turning to the

second

motivation,

Olympics

represents a good method to increase and improve local economies.

This

is due to the fact that host cities usually invest huge amounts of money to improve their facilities,

such

as stadiums or swimming pools. As a consequence of

government's

Correct article usage

the government's

show examples

investments, lots of new job places are created.

Moreover

, local economies can thrive

also

due to the increased levels of tourism, which is typical during the

Olympic

period.

For instance

, all hotels and restaurants in host cities and nearby are always fully booked. To conclude, even though some

people

consider

Olympics

games

useless nowadays, I still believe they have a big relevance for both

people

and countries. These

games

are still a wonderful occasion that we can use to celebrate our

countries's

Remove the s

countries'

show examples

success.

Furthermore

, thanks to

local

Correct article usage

the local

show examples

government's investments and the increased levels of tourism, local economies will flourish during the

Olympic

season.

Submitted by lucrezia.giunta97 on Mon Mar 21 2022

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

6.50

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Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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