IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Write about the following topic. To meet the growing needs of food for the increasing population, country should make use of edible insects as foods. However, some people believe that insects are not only unhealthy but affect negatively the nature too. What are the benefits and drawbacks of eating insects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#topic #food #population #country #insects #foods #people #nature
With the steadily rising population, the issue of
food
 scarcity will be undeniable in the foreseeable future. It is important for us humans to look at alternative options available for
food
such
 as edible
insects
. There are many debates about the use of edible
insects
 as
food
 where there are several benefits and drawbacks in doing so. Having
insects
 as
food
 is not an unusual option as it sounds as there are already many countries in the world that
comsume
Correct your spelling
consume
insects
 for
food
.
For instance
, Mexico, Africa, China and so on.
Use
Correct article usage
The use
show examples
 of edible
insects
 can be beneficial for a country as it would reduce consumption of other
food
 resources
such
 as
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
 and meat.
This
 can help a country preserve
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
 resources for
future
Add an article
the future
show examples
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
.
Moreover
,
insects
 contain
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 amount
Correct your spelling
protein
protien
Change preposition
of protien
show examples
 and other nutrients which makes
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 feasible as
alternative
Add an article
an alternative
show examples
 choice of
food
. Along with
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 of eating
insects
 as
food
, there are some drawbacks
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 make people hesitant to eat
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. We are all aware that
insect
Fix the agreement mistake
insects
show examples
 feed on decaying matter
such
rotten
Change preposition
as rotten
show examples
food
, animal corpses, human waste and so on,
this
 is
also
 one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
 why we want
insects
 at bay from our home.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
 is why having to eat
insects
 as
food
 can be quite daunting and can have harmful impacts
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our health. It may even carry parasites that are not only harmful but
also
 deadly.
Furthermore
, there is
possibility
Add an article
the possibility
a possibility
show examples
 of allergy to people as there is little known about
it's
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
 reaction to our body.
Submitted by chahanadangol on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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