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Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #world
There is no doubt, we can not
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
 alone,
evendough
Correct your spelling
even dough
 in nowadays either in the past.
However
, some
people
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 to be
take
Wrong verb form
taken
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 care
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 other
people
, but
also
 we can not always ask other
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 hand. In my
view
Add a comma
,view
show examples
 it
is depend
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
 on
situation
Correct article usage
the situation
show examples
 and condition. At
this
momment
Correct your spelling
moment
, we can see ages is one of the strongest
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
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 why
humanity
Replace the word
humans
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
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 to
carrying
Change the verb form
carry
show examples
 each other.
Firstly
, I will give you
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 example,
baby
Fix the agreement mistake
babies
show examples
survive
Change the verb form
survives
show examples
 without their parents, they need support from older
people
.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
Correct your spelling
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
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 must
be supervise
Change the verb form
be supervised
show examples
 by adults, they
hungger
Correct your spelling
hunger
 to learn some knowledge and skill for living. And
Finally
 elder peoples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can not works and
phisically
Correct your spelling
physically
 they drop
,
Change preposition
out, thats
show examples
thats
Correct your spelling
that's
 why there is no reason they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 need other
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
help
Add the particle
to help
show examples
.
At
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, all
people
 have to achieve their own goal or dream, because of that at some point their
reliaze
Correct your spelling
realize
 they need to stand by their own legs to chasing their purpose.
For example
,
Correct your spelling
if
show examples
it
Correct your spelling
if
show examples
 they want to become
Add an article
a doctor
show examples
doctor
Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
show examples
 they have to
be learn
Change the verb form
be learned
show examples
 by
Correct your spelling
themself
themselves
show examples
them self
Correct your spelling
themself
show examples
. To conclude
this
 debate, I will give my perspective, ages
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
the crucial
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 reason why
people
 needs to be
depended
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
 on each other or not. Young
people
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 to learn from elder
people
.
Aduld
Correct your spelling
Adult
Adults
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to work hard
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their own to achieve their dreams.
Submitted by 805hans on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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