IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Some think that governments should tax unhealthy foods to encourage people to eat healthier. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#think #governments #tax #foods #people
It is obvious that food is paramount for
people
 in their daily lives.
Therefore
,
people
 believe that food
that is
 harmful to the
health
 should be taxed by the government to make
people
 eat healthy food.
Although
 charging unhealthy
foods
 is a good way of encouragement, I believe that they should
also
 be aware of
foods
 that are detrimental to their
health
.
To begin
 with, it is clear that eating unhealthy
foods
 in daily life makes consumers a lot of
health
 problems. Junk
foods
 taxed by governments are effective in encouraging
people
 to consume nutritiously.
For example
, if fast
foods
 are expensive because of taxed fees and organic
foods
 are not expensive
then
 consumers will buy cheaper ones as they are used to checking the prices before they buy any
foods
.
Thus
, taxing
foods
 that are not good for
health
 is stimulating
people
 to eat healthier
foods
.
On the other hand
, enlightening the users to be self-awareness about the risk of non-nutritious
foods
 and in order to avoid eating those
foods
.
Although
 some
people
 might realize that
foods
 are harmful even can cause diseases but they may continue to eat because of a lack of self-awareness.
For instance
, smokers know that smoking is not good for their
health
 but most of them are still smoking. So, to improve self-consciousness,
people
 were enlightened regularly and
this
 make them avoid those unhealthy
foods
. To conclude,
however
, governments should tax
foods
 that are unhealthy so that the public to eat healthier, I assert that self-awareness is important as well for them.
Submitted by sandarmyint740 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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