IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

positive or negative development online shopping

It goes without saying that educating young
people
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 to refrain from getting involved in
crime
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 is incredibly crucial as they are the future of society. Somone that the best way to achieve
this
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 is allowing criminals who had corrected the mistakes now to communicate with
teenagers
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. Personally, I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint. In my opinion,
this
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 proposal could be extremely efficient since those
people
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 have a background of
crime
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.
In other words
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, all the
teenagers
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 tend to trust the words and suggestions spoken by a person who had
such
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 a real history. By describing their experience,
such
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 as the terrible impact on their future employment and how miserable life is when they were in prison, It could make the youths realize that committing a
crime
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 not only lead to serious consequences but
also
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 hurts their future.
Thus
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,
this
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 is a desirable approach to prevent
people
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 at a young age from making mistakes. Those who disagree may argue that the
police
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 officers would be the most suitable role to talk about
crime
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 with students due to they are the authority in
this
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 aspect. As is known to all, catching criminals and protecting
this
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 society is the major job of the
police
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 officer, which enable them to have a professional understanding of
crime
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.
However
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, perhaps
this
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 is true, but it cannot be denied that
police
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 often reduce
crime
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 by warning
teenagers
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 what should not do. In
this
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 way, the youths could have a sense of limiting their freedom which may result in a conflict between
police
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 and young
people
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. To sum up, the
police
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 is the expert in the area of
crime
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, but
teenagers
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 are more willing to accept the advice given by
people
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 who experienced crimes.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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