Some people think that personal happiness is directly related to economic success. Others argue that happiness depends on different factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There has always been much discussion around well-being and ways of promoting it. While some can relate contentment to monetary approaches and material prosperity, others are proponents of considering multiple factors. Herein, we will discuss both points of view and explore why I am in favour of the latter. On the one hand, we can achieve jubilation in many different ways.
Firstly
Linking Words
, meeting a person’s needs may bring a sense of joy. As an ultimate example, by satisfying a basic need,
such
Linking Words
as the need of being loved, someone’s soft skills may yield sheer happiness. It happens when a person can socialize and can fraternize aptly.
Secondly
Linking Words
, being knowledgeable can act as a way of gaining satisfaction and
consequently
Linking Words
being happy.
For example
Linking Words
, some scientists and philosophers, namely Spinoza and Kant, have rejected materialistic values in exchange for being able to find real blissfulness, in knowledge, and in the power of wisdom.
Thus
Linking Words
, exhilaration can be pursued in a multiplicity of ways, which are not necessarily related to money.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, never has the effect of money on the pursuit of happiness been marginal; Many people consider it a direct influencer. Some reasonings can defy
this
Linking Words
belief.
First
Linking Words
, being rich has not always brought about elation. To exemplify, some rich people claim that
as a result
Linking Words
of being full of remorse, they do not have the ideal life they have always been wishing.
Second
Linking Words
, some incurable diseases can ruin every bright aspect of one’s life despite having ample money.
For instance
Linking Words
, no matter the walk of life, suffering from HIV leaves no room for being blissful as it is supposed to be incurable. In conclusion, whereas some people believe that well-being is a direct consequence of economic success, I think there are some other contributing factors.
Submitted by Reza on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: