IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Write about the following topic: Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #country #health #service #treatments
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Medical
services
, without cost, are very hard to be distributed to every citizen which is very costly. I strongly disagree with those free
services
 provided by the Government, as its complete wastage of the country's economy in an irrelevant way. People often are suffering from an oflot
new
Change preposition
of new
show examples
 diseases which are expensive to get treated.
The
Correct word choice
If the
show examples
 authority provides all facilities without payments,
then
 it might result in a negative impact as patients may take that care for granted and there is a high chance of being a misuse of medicines and goods. For which at least if some amounts are allocated for a treatment procedure, those will have proper follow-up and it results to a better outcome as well as collecting revenue from the locals, ultimately adding help for sustainable growth in finance and health sector.
For example
, village health post
services
 are very less or of no cost which makes community people not to visit there because they think it's not providing good
services
 and medicines are outdated which is not true in fact,
Similarly
Add a comma
,Similarly
show examples
 if some amount is charged they believe that organization provides good service which resultantly leads to a better allowance to run that service
furthermore
 . In conclusion, if some payments are required for getting treatment
then
 it will help in the long run for its continued health
services
.
Submitted by sht.teclab on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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