In many countries, Government likes to spend more money on the arts. Some people agree with this. Others think the government should spend more on health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #government #money #arts #people #health #education

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Nowadays, there is much controversy over money that governments should spend on

arts

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. While some people believe that

arts

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deserve governmental attention, others argue that

health

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and

education

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are two entities

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

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require more

Fix the agreement mistake

attention

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attentions

Correct your spelling

attention

show examples

Although

Linking Words

it is widely accepted that

arts

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have played important roles in keeping countries'

cultures

Use synonyms

, I believe

health

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and

education

Use synonyms

should be located above all. The following essay will overlook both views which are proceeding with my opinion. On one hand,

arts

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have always been viewed as

undettachable

Correct your spelling

undetachable

parts of

cultures

Use synonyms

, which carry out countries' histories and beliefs to the

Linking Words

generation.

For example

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, by reviewing graphics that were found carved on stones in Iran, ancient Iranian cultural ceremonies were revealed after hundreds of years and now people are trying to hold those ceremonies again.

Thus

Linking Words

, for keeping

cultures

Use synonyms

safe, authorities are expected to dedicate enough budget to

Use synonyms

arts

Correct article usage

the arts

show examples

On the other hand

Linking Words

Remove the article

apply

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proper investment in

health

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and

education

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is required for a society to survive.

First

Linking Words

of all, people should be healthy unless they could not enjoy their lives.

For instance

Linking Words

, the necessity of a good

health

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care system felt more than

Correct your spelling

anything

show examples

any thing

Correct your spelling

anything

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during

Covid

Correct article usage

the Covid

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pandemic, even though governments tried hard to provide different virtual art programs to

entertaine

Correct your spelling

entertain

entertained

the public.

Moreover

Linking Words

, for a community to improve in the twentieth century, an educated young generation is needed to compete with others. To illustrate, many developed communities like Canada have been updating their educational systems

continuously

Replace the word

continue

show examples

to nurture a better generation and remain a developed country. To sum up,

arts

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can not be neglected because it is rooted in

cultures

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and is a way of transferring it to the future population whereas

health

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is the most important entity that can overshadow other things, and

education

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is a fundamental pillar that makes a community. I believe that governments should address

health

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and

education

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before

Use synonyms

arts

Correct article usage

the arts

show examples

Submitted by panizfathi70128 on Fri Apr 08 2022

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

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In the modern era, internet became really popular and widely used around the world. While some people believe that individuals are more isolated due to using the Internet, I am in favor of the view that it allows humans to keep in touch with others effortlessly.

In many countries, Government likes to spend more money on the arts. Some people agree with this. Others think the government should spend more on health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

When choosing a job, salary is the most important decision. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

To succeed in a business, one needs to be good at maths. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the modern era, internet became really popular and widely used around the world. While some people believe that individuals are more isolated due to using the Internet, I am in favour of the view that it allows humans to keep in touch with others effortlessly. Trung