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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people argue that spending a lot of money holding birthday parties, wedding parties and other celebration is a waste of money. However, others believe such parties are important for individuals and for society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #money #birthday #parties #celebration #waste #individuals #society
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In the current world, most
people
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 like to celebrate any special occasion by inviting a lot of
people
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. The discussion that throwing too much
money
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 to hold
parties
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 like birthdays, marriage or any other special event is a debatable one, with strong logic provided by the supporters of both the views. A few argue that the special events need to be celebrated grandly, as it happens only a few times in a lifetime.
For instance
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, marriage is considered to occur once in a lifetime and the
people
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 want to have the memory of that event until their
last
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 breath.
This
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 is possible only when the location is well decorated and all of the friends and the neighbours are invited. By spending limited
money
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, it is almost impossible to achieve something special which will be remembered forever.
Thus
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 it is obvious, why some
people
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 incline toward
this
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 point of view.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 believe that it is not right to spend a huge amount of
money
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 on personal celebrations as there are a lot of
people
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 across the globe under starvation.
For example
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, in most African countries, many
people
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 do not even have food to eat for a single meal a day. In case, the
money
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 spent on the celebration can be sent to the
people
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 who are really in need, definitely, a lot of life can be saved.
Hence
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, it is clear why a few individuals refute high spending
parties
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. Considering the memories of special occasions as well as starvation, spending much
money
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 on
parties
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 has been supported and refuted by many. Even though memories of some special events are important, saving human life from starvation is more important.
Hence
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, in my opinion, it is necessary to cut down the spending on
parties
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 and spend that
money
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 on the poor
people
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’s food.
Submitted by Toni R on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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