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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

People's shopping habits depend more on the age group they belong to than other factors. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #habits #age #group #factors
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There are a number of factors that can affect
people
’s
consumption
 habits
such
 as
age
, financial conditions and gender differences.
Therefore
, from my point of view,
age
 is simply one of them. It is undeniable that
age
 does
hasve
Correct your spelling
have
 a profound impact on what
people
 consume.
People
 in their different stages of life have various concepts including value
concept
Fix the agreement mistake
concepts
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 and
consumption
concept
Fix the agreement mistake
concepts
show examples
. Generally, the elderly usually don’t shop for fun, but just for some daily necessities.
By comparison
, the younger tend to enjoy the fun of shopping and buy many newfangled gadgets which may actually be quite useless.
Moreover
, the pattern of
consumption
also
 varies from
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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 to
people
 of different ages.
For instance
, the elderly are more likely to go to some warehouse stores due to the slow-paced living style, in comparison to
younger
Add an article
the younger
a younger
show examples
 generation, who may tend to choose some more efficient ways like delivery. Apart from the
age
, there are many other factors that contribute to the shopping habits. Financial conditions
is
Change the verb form
are
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, undoubtedly, a crucial
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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. For the rich, luxury items might be part of their daily
consumption
, while for
people
 who are not that well off these staff are not affordable.
Also
, gender should be considered. Typically, the men do not make as many comparisons as the women do before making the final decisions, especially
in
Change preposition
on
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 some occasions like choosing clothes which may be deemed as torment for some
people
. To sum up, I believe that
age
 is an important factor that affects one’s shopping pattern, but not the only one. Many other aspects can
also
 have a strong impact as well.
Submitted by 59213142 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption patterns
  • digital natives
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar stores
  • target demographic
  • disposable income
  • consumer behavior
  • market segmentation
  • purchasing power
  • retail therapy
  • brand loyalty
  • impulse buying
  • price-sensitive
  • cross-generational
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