Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement.

#wealth #guaranty #happiness

Money

plays

important

Correct article usage

an important

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

role in our

life

.Some

people

believe that it could not gives

Change the article

show examples

enjoyable

life

.While in my perspective,

money

provides a comfort zone,

fullfill

Correct your spelling

fulfil

all basic needs and

luxucy

Correct your spelling

luxury

life

This

essay will

further

elaborate my views and

thus

lead to a logical conclusion. Analyzing the statement and explaining

further

the

first

and foremost behind

its

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

is worth considering that with the help of

money

people

can purchase anything

what

Change the word

that

show examples

they want and

stastify

Correct your spelling

satisfy

themselves.

For example

, If a wants a luxury home

then

Change preposition

apply

show examples

buying a house gives a

luxuries

Replace the word

luxurious

show examples

life

which gives them

confort

Correct your spelling

comfort

and

happy

Replace the word

happiness

show examples

Additionally

people

can get food to eat,

Correct your spelling

clothes

show examples

cloths

Correct your spelling

clothes

show examples

to wear and shelter to sleep

Change preposition

in.

show examples

Thus

, they can get

education

Correct article usage

an education

show examples

by paying the fees in

institution

Add an article

the institution

an institution

show examples

and become a

succesfull

Correct your spelling

successful

person

in their

life

Moreover

People

can

also

take care of their health.

For instance

, If a

person

is purchasing a

healthing

Correct your spelling

health

healthy

food

then

impoves

Correct your spelling

improves

their overall

performace

Correct your spelling

performance

, gives

Correct pronoun usage

them more

show examples

energy to do their work, helps them to concentrate

their

Change preposition

on their

show examples

work and students can focus

their

Change preposition

on their

show examples

stuides

Correct your spelling

studies

Furthermore

Money

can buy anything and gives a

person

a better and dream

life

Hence

, nowadays without

money

Add a comma

,money

show examples

nobody can achieve their dreams.

Add an article

A person

The person

show examples

Person

Fix the agreement mistake

People

show examples

can get

Remove the article

apply

show examples

higher education in any profession they want. To

recapitualte

Correct your spelling

recapitulate

, according to the argument aforementioned above, Government should

also

help to schools by providing them free

cources

Correct your spelling

courses

sources

in some instant because not everyone

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a big amount to do any

cource

Correct your spelling

course

of study.

This

could help

Change preposition

apply

show examples

all children to get

education

Add an article

an education

show examples

without any worry of paying fees. In

last

Change preposition

with

show examples

money

people

can

fullfill

Correct your spelling

fulfil

their dreams easily.

Submitted by simran201617 on Mon Apr 11 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to their studies in school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

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