In some countries, there are many social problems involving teenagers. Some people say this is because parents spend much of their time at work and not at home. Do you agree or disagree?
In various nations, society faces
number
of issues related to adolescents. Some part of the society believes that Change the article
a number
the number
this
is the consequence of the more working hours of their parents
rather than their time spent at home. I support this
notion as
when Add the preposition
toas
Add an article
the family
a family
family
is not giving enough time to their children Fix the agreement mistake
families
in
Change preposition
at
their
young age that in Change the word
a
return
can lead to anti-social Replace the word
turn
behaviour
of teens.
Transition
period of a Add an article
A transition
The transition
child
is the phase of major development and changes in ones's
Remove the s
ones'
behaviour
and habits; therefore
, utmost care of
Change preposition
for
child
is required in every segment of Add an article
a child
the child
this
period and neglection or less attention can result in indiscipline and many more ill habits can develop which in return can cause disturbance in normal social functioning of a teenager in a community. For example
, a documentary on the TLC channel once depicted an incidence
Replace the word
incident
happened
in a family in the Texas region, the Correct pronoun usage
that happened
child
of that family was not recieving
attention from his Correct your spelling
receiving
parents
because of their job schedule and that resulted in an attention seeking
Add a hyphen
attention-seeking
behaviour
involving breaking of furniture, playing loud music and getting into a quarrel with neighbours and many more but the a
drastic event happened when the family ignored all these signals and the Choose an article
the
a
child
went overboard by hitting the neighbour's child
with a bat and making him bleed. Thus
, such
problems can occur due to family's less indulgence in home
activities in comparison to Add a hyphen
in-home
job
environment.
Add an article
the job
Moreover
, events of juvinile
Correct your spelling
juvenile
deliquency
Correct your spelling
delinquency
is
on Change the verb form
are
Correct article usage
the rise
rise
day by day and many Change the verb form
rising
researches
are being carried out on the reasons, Change the wording
types of research
pieces of research
kinds of research
factors
affecting it. The studies conducted until now illustrates parental Correct word choice
and factors
neglection
as one of the major cause of these incidences. Replace the word
neglect
For instance
, a descriptive study conducted on teenagers in
the University of Cambridge,who Change preposition
at
were
involved in anti-social activities made it an obvious fact that if the house members of these children would have spent enough moments knowing about their Change the verb form
was
child
in terms of behaviour
, likings
,dislikings Fix the agreement mistake
liking
then
the consequences would have been different.Hence
, the time table
of Correct your spelling
timetable
parents
involving work as a major part and least part to
their young children result in a drastic impact on them in terms of their social pattern.
To conclude, teenagers whose Change preposition
of
parents
are prefering
their Correct your spelling
preferring
work life
over parental life Add a hyphen
work-life
leads
to detrimental Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
Replace the word
effects
affects
on their social functioning giving rise to community issues in form of violence, Correct your spelling
effects
quarrels
. Correct word choice
and quarrels
Inaddition
Correct your spelling
In addition
,
can lead to Remove the comma
apply
permanent
negative Add an article
a permanent
change
in Fix the agreement mistake
changes
teen's
personality that in return can cause disturbance in Correct article usage
a teen's
social
activity of the one.Add an article
the social
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Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.