IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible argument on both sides, and say which side you personally support.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Although
Linking Words
children
Use synonyms
 need to spend their past
time
Use synonyms
 with families, it is
also
Linking Words
 necessary to spend their
time
Use synonyms
 on personal growth.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the pros and cons of both aspects.
However
Linking Words
, in my view, I think it's essential to spend
time
Use synonyms
 learning new things and extracurricular activities.
First
Linking Words
 of all,
children
Use synonyms
 nowadays are competitive. They have access to new technology, new opportunities to study and are keen on taking part in various sports. Apart from academic knowledge they use their free
time
Use synonyms
 to engage in
such
Linking Words
 activities.
For instance
Linking Words
, some schools insist that schools students should participate in sports , and extracurricular activities.
This
Linking Words
 personally will inspire them to thrive better as adults.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, family is the most significant unit in our lives. It is important to spend quality
time
Use synonyms
 with them.
For example
Linking Words
, studies suggest that for the growth of a child they need to have good communication and social interaction.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a good mental connection will help
children
Use synonyms
 to grow into confident adults.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, spending all the past
time
Use synonyms
 with family is unnecessary. It will not give the child to persuade new things in life. They will be restricted to a certain group of people which will not help them to grow individually.
For instance
Linking Words
, families can be restrictive intentionally or unintentionally which can lead to a sedentary lifestyle. To conclude, I believe leisure
time
Use synonyms
 should be managed wisely.
Children
Use synonyms
 should be given the proper platform to learn new things at a tender age.
Although
Linking Words
 it's essential to spend
time
Use synonyms
 with family, it's useless to spend all their free
time
Use synonyms
 with them .

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • strengthen family bonds
  • emotional support
  • instill values
  • nurturing environment
  • secure and loved
  • social skills
  • independence
  • sense of identity
  • diverse environments
  • adaptable
  • open-minded
  • balanced development
  • foundational support
What to do next:
Look at other essays: