The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The first graph illustrates the
Use synonyms
Japanese
Correct quantifier usage
number of Japanese
show examples
tourists
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traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
abroad from 1985 to 1995. We can see in the bar graph that the number of
tourists
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continuously grows over
this
Linking Words
decade.
While
Linking Words
in 1985, about 5
Million
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Japanese
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traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
abroad, already 15
Million
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left Japan for Vacation in 1995. The
second
Linking Words
chart shows the share of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japanese
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tourists
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that
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
to
Australia
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. In 1985, less than 50
percent
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per cent
show examples
of
Japanese
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tourists
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flew to
Australia
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. 5
Million
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Japanese
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left their country for vacation, and 2
Million
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traveled
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travelled
show examples
to
Australia
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in 1985. If we compare the year 1985 with the year 1995, we can see that more
Japanese
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were
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
abroad, but it is the same ratio of
tourists
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that
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
to
Australia
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as in 1985. 15
Million
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Japanese
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went abroad, and 6
Million
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went to
Australia
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.
This
Linking Words
is a little less than 50
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. We can
also
Linking Words
see that the share of
Japanese
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tourists
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decreased in 1990.
Submitted by korbinian.schoerghuber on

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words japanese, tourists, million, australia with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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