Some people believe it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations

Unfortunate

Change the word

Unfortunately

show examples

events happen to the best of everyone even though no one signed up for it.

While

some individuals believe that little or nothing could be done to alter unsatisfactory conditions, others think it is better to work and improve those situations.

This

essay will discuss both views and I will give my candid thought. Life is difficult and it hits some harder than others. Some circumstances (

such

as death) can not be salvaged because no matter how hard anyone tries it is impossible to get positive results.

For instance

, when a woman loses her pregnancy it is an extremely bad situation

however

anyone's capability during that same pregnancy cannot be restored.

As a result

this

and other comparable circumstances can decide to not try and improve.

On the other hand

, when there is life, there's hope. Even if the woman in the example given earlier can not undo her unfortunate outcome, she could always try for another baby that would end up being successful.

Also

, with a shortage of money and unsatisfactory jobs, no one should decide to accept poverty or ill-treatment at work for whatever reason because there will always be better jobs as long as the knowledge and skills for

such

employment are met.

For example

, quitting an unfavourable work environment could motivate a person to start up his/her own business. In conclusion, I believe that when life throws us lemons, we make lemonades out of them.

While

some incidents are awful and cannot be changed, individuals need to realize that

except

Correct word choice

unless

show examples

one is willing, a solution can not be found.

Submitted by adeluvadeife on Wed Apr 13 2022

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task response

The essay addresses both views (accepting a bad situation and trying to improve it) adequately.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is generally clear and easy to follow.

lexical resource

The essay requires a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource.

grammatical range

There are some noticeable grammar errors throughout the essay, which need to be addressed.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

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Some people believe it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?”

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Today, many people do not know their neighbour in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

The number of indigenous tribes living traditional lives in the world’s rainforests is decreasing. Within a few decades the last of these indigenous tribes may have disappeared forever. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?

Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities. Others say that it depends on other factors. What is your opinion?